It’s almost that time again folks! Fantasy Football is right around the corner and ChiCitySports is here to provide you with a slew of funny fantasy football team names for the 2012 season.
The only thing more important than maneuvering the waiver wire at 2AM after Monday Night Football is having a catchy, offensive, or funny team name. If you have a funny team name that isn’t in our list, be sure to let us know in the comments section.
You can check out our previous annual lists below.
Funny Fantasy Football Team Names for 2010
Funny Fantasy Football Team Names for 2011
Funny Fantasy Football Team Names for 2011 Part 2
Best, Funny, Offensive, and Clever Fantasy Football Generic Team Names for 2012
Run DMC – Fantasy Football is all about snagging the top running back. Guys like Arian Foster and Chris Johnson have dominated in years’ past, this year Darrin McFadden of the Oakland Raiders is going to be among the top backs. He had a great season last year and the Raiders will stick with the PeeWee football concept of “giving the ball to the fast kid every play”. Oh yeah, his initials are also the same as a popular hip-hop group a long time ago…you may have heard of them.
She Gotta Gronk – Rob Gronkowski burst onto the scene of the NFL last season destroying TE records for most touchdowns caught in a season. Patriots QB Tom Brady found himself his new favorite target. Many are asking if how he will follow up that amazing season in 2012. It shouldn’t matter how he does because even if he catches…you know…single digit touchdowns instead of double digit touchdowns, Gronk is still a bro. He’s the most bro player in the entire NFL. As evidenced by him throwing down shortly after the Patriots lost in the Super Bowl on the dance floor and taking shirtless pictures with porn stars. Unfortunately his name aligns itself well with the popular shitty song I remember hearing on the radio “She Gotta Donk”.
Ice Cold Bruschi’s – Who doesn’t love a good ESPN analyst that used to be a player? Tedy Bruschi ever since becoming an ESPN analyst has pissed off a lot of people and been forced to apologize to them or reference how crazy he was acting. He makes for good television especially when he goes off on people like Ocho Cinco. If Bruschi can take anything away from Rob Gronkowski, it’s that he needs to just chill out, be a bro, and drink some ice cold bruschi’s.
Paea Forte – A Chicago sports site just HAD to get in a Bears team name. Get it? PAY FORTE! Well, not so fast. Bears fans are all about getting Matt Forte signed to a contract that will make him happy but, can we all agree that Matt just needs to shut the hell up? Forte is frustrated with how the front office is handling his contract situation and I am right there with him but, going to the media is the wrong thing to do. I am not on the #PayForte train but I am on the #PayForteArespectableAmountOfMoneySoHeShutsUp train. Get it done Phil Emery!
You Say Goodbye, I say Helu! – I don’t know why you say goodbye, I say Helu!!!! The popular Beatles song “You say goodbye, I say Hello” just so happens to be the perfect lyric to switch out the word for Hello, in exchange for Roy Helu’s last name. The amount of cleverness taken to come up with this one was minimal but, it shall get the job done for fantasy owners that wish to draft Roy Helu.
The White Mike Vicks – At the beginning of last season, ESPN published a story entitled “What if Michael Vick were white?”. Not only was the article stupid but, it was accompanied by a photoshopped picture of Michael Vick…..if he was white. There is no further description needed. This is gold.
Gayless for Bayless – It wouldn’t be an accurate list if we didn’t somehow include Skip Bayless. Bayless plays the “obnoxious bad guy” role on ESPN’s First Take. He is often slobbing on Tim Tebows’ jock for completing less than 50% of his passes or hating on LeBron James. Whether you love him or hate him, you have to admit the guy is entertaining. When he gets torn to shreds by Mark Cuban and the video is passed around the internet like 2 Girls, 1 Cup was, you know he’s at the very least culturally relevant to the sports world. I personally love Skip Bayless, not because he ever makes sense but, because he is a master troll.
Rashard Mendenladen – You may remember when Rashard Mendenhall of the Steelers tweeted about Bin Ladens’ death. If you don’t, you most definitely remember the backlash. Mendenhall tweeted “What kind of person celebrates DEATH? It’s amazing how people can hate a man they have never even heard speak. We’ve only heard one side”. Whether you agree with him or not, the “THIS IS MURRICA!” ideal fully set in. This is an entire season late but, since we didn’t publish it last season, it definitely deserves it!
Matt and Julio Down by the Schoolyard – If there is one thing in life I could teach any of you reading this, it’s that Paul Simon is a wonderful musician and is the man. Another thing I can teach you is that a Matt Ryan and Julio Jones combination this season could be very beneficial to you. Pay homage to Paul Simon, Matty Ice, and Julio Jones with this bomb ass team name.
Off in Church – Your opponent never wants to claim they are “beating off in church”. For that reason, this makes Off in Church the ULTIMATE fantasy football team name.
If you have some good fantasy team names, leave a comment and share it with the world! Or don’t bitch.
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Ha i love these, i probably spend equal time naming my team as i do making a draft board.
Stump the Schaub
High off the Weeden
Two lovely Coples
Did you see my name for the CCS league, Rush? Suh Girls, One Cup.
SanduskyLUCKEDPeyton2
I beat this guy in the finals last year that had Romo and I won by like 12 pts. His new team name: RomoF’dMeofMyFFTitle
I can’t take credit for it but I can’t believe it hasn’t been posted or listed before. I love the show “The League”, so I named one of my teams the Vinegar Strokes.
two lost donkeys
Shaving Ryans Privates
Favre Fingers In Her Percy
Momma Dez Knock You Out
Tebow’s before hoes
The Real Slim Brady
Bounties Are A Brees.
Catch Me If You CAM!
Close Encounters of “RG The 3rd” Kind
Clost Endzones of RG The 3rd Kind
Jolly Beanie Giant
Helu, Are You There?
What Would Jones-Drew
Brady’s First
Skip To My Helu
The FIrst Brady
Great Wallace of China
Quiet on The Greene
Britt By Britt
Colston .45
Nicks It In The Bud
Jordy, Jordy Look Who’s Forte
Heroes Ahmad Us
Ponderlic
As I Ponder Through The Valley
In Not What You Know, It’s Julio You Know
Coffee And Hakeem
Hakeem And Sugar
The Playbook Of Eli
Lets Win, Maybe!
The 7 Year Lynch
Sippin On My Ginn and Juice
Mo’ Manning, Mo’ Problems
Rise Of The Felix
Heavy As A Flacco Potatoes
The FItz Of The Month
Gronki Kong
Let’s Go To Jamaal!
Roll The Rice
Of Men And Rice
A Few Good Mendenhall
Ahmadly In Love
That One Was A Cruzy
Liquor & Cruz
Win Or Cruz
America’s Got Tamme
The Big Breesy
Looking For That Special Brady
Brady and The Tramp
My Brees Buckled
Let’s Get Roddy
My Roddy Side
RoddySlam
Gone With The WIn
Citizen Wayne
Pondered Money
You Got Me In The Flacco
Stop That ImFOSTER
Mission ImFOSTERble
NapADRIAN Dynamite
Keeping Up WIth The KardADRIANS
That Dirty Gore
The Walking Fred
Natural Born Spillers
25 Grahams
The Hoover Graham
Graham You To Hell
Catch Me If You Graham
Silence Of The Grahams (or Cams)
VietGraham
Graham And Cheese
Summer Of Cam
ShaGraham!
TD In A Lynch
Frankly My Dear, I Don’t Give A Graham
ImHighOnMoss
vinceWilforkyourMom
D-Jack & McNutt on U
Over the Dwayne Bowe
The Touchey Sandusky’s
Pitching a Trent
Titsburg feelers
Blowing My Loadholt
The SanFranduskys
Maurice Bones-Jews
Jerry’s Youth Group is my name in one of my leauges
Junior-Say-OW
Breaston Show
Touchy Feely
Sacks? Dockett can Doucet
Justin the Nicks of time
Diehling out hits
Coughlin out rings
Sacks are Suh easy
Manning the Cruz control
All great suggestions, keep them coming.
Here’s my Top 10 list; the last 2 are actual names I use for my own teams:
Romney/Rex Ryan 2012
New Orleans Satans
Head and Butter
Tim Uno Cinco
Carnival Cruz
Bengalus Green-Ellis
Jake Urlocker
Gronko Nagurski
Vicktorious Secret
Jim Ottopick Draft
Tittsburgh Feelers
Seau it isn’t so
Show me your TD’s
iGotWeedenMyPocket
Kibbles and Vick
Asomugha to Mouth
Here’s 2 that I used last year,
Manning Down, Need Back Up
Stafford Infection
Stupid Dez as Stupid Does
BREASTON-GREENmakeslifeBURFICT
Breaston Plants
I Touch, Down There
Donte Doesn’t Stall-worth
-Mine from last year
Ben Steeling The Percy
(My Girlfriend Came up with this one)
2Mannings1Cup
Mine from last year…
The Dexter McCluster f*cks
Queer Eye 4 Eli
cruzin 4 a bruzin
best greene by the graham
Go Deep or Go Home
Abc easy as rg3,
smoke Sweden drinks forte’s,
your percy better titan up,
peyton my hightower til I gronk,
sacks to be cutler,
The good the bad and the cowboys
Sandusky’s Shower’s
The Soapy Sandusky
Sandusky’s Daycare Squad
The Uncle Sandusky
Tickle my Sandusky
Fast Times in Penn St. Shower’s
Joke: “whats black blue & hates sex?”
anser: ” the 12yr old boy tied up in Sandusky’s trunk”
SANDUSKY SHOWER SQUAD!!!
50 Shades of Greene
*9 hold the brees
Vickdumb of Injuries
Ben Rapthisfurburger
Antonio Brownderez
Tony Homo
Andre’s Johnson
Antonio Master Gates
Michael Turnedher
Greg’s Little Dick
T.O’s money for support
The MATTfields and Mccoys
Premature E_Macklin8n
Multiple Scoregasms
I have been thinkin and can only come up with Suicidal Seau’s & T.O’s P.O
Can’t really share any in English, but I’ve been naming myself something obscene and insulting in Spanish when read in English:
T.N.S. L. P.P. B.N. T.S.O.
Momma Male Pee Toe
So Noon Knows Cool Arrows
Ah Come Oh Hoe Days
Chin Got Two Mod Ray Poo Toe
Double Decker with cheese
Mike Vick in a Box
Clean out Ur-lacher
Gronkey Punch
“smokin a bowe” or “drinking a forte”
Upper Decker
Marcus colston cremery
Pam Anderson’s Tits.
“Snappin Necks & Cashin Checks”
“Ass Whoopings & Lolipops”
“Hot Carl’s Steaming Pile”
Rusty Trombeanie
Gronkey Punch
The Roddy Snatchers
Manning an Unsinkable Ship
My 3 Teams:
Silly Nannies
The Handballers
Vick In A Box
And my wife’s team:
Forte Shades of Grey
Pacman Jones makes it Dwayne at the TD club
It’s not a rookie, it’s a Cam Newton
McCluster F#ck
CAMden Yards
Don’t Luck at my Fleener
Rice, Rice, Baby
Sandusky’s Foster Kids
For Gisele My Nisele (Tom Brady)
Show me your TDS
BEN THERE RAPED THAT
Here’s our league:
Uncle Knuckles
One-van-zero-windows
Tickle Monsters
Multiple Scoregasms
TDs & Beer
30 yrs well worth it
SANDUSKYshowers
Tip Kissers
Tebowned
TapDatAss Squad
Oscar Mayer Weiners
Pissing Off Opposing Coaches (or teams)
Weeden Forte’s (wordplay for weed & 40 oz)
Garden of Weeden
Weeden Blounts
Manningham & Eggs
Russell Mania (Russell Wilson)
Danger Russ
Russ in boots
Peyton’s Playhouse
Jake’s Dirty Locker
Jake Plummer’s Crack
Jim Schwartzenegger
Sweaty Jim Schwartz
Eat My Schwartz
Seymour TDs (self explanatory)
Bacon Bettis and Tomato
Dennis Green Tea
Dennis Greenbeans
Herm Edward Scissor Hands
Mangini Alfredo
Eric Mangini Salad
Ty Obey The Law (Ty Law)
ReX-Factor
ReX-Men
Suh Plex
Chicken noodle SuhP (soup)
Suh Me
General Suh’s Chicken
In the purSuh of happiness
Reggie Bushwhacked
T.Y. Hilton Hotel
Re Gronkulous
Gronka Truck
Al Groh some Nutz
Dennis Pitta Bread
Lord Have Percy On Me
Bey Watch (Darrius Heyward-Bey)
Bey Area
Old Bey Seasoning
Oh Bey Your Thirst
Touchdown Her Shirt
Sand Cassel
King of the Cassel
Tuna Cassel Roll
Jacquizzed in my pants
Pop Quizz
Nobody does like Sean Lee
Sean Taylor Gang (R.I.P.)